Funny smartass quotes about life

Mar 20, 2023 - Explore marie vandiver's board "smartass quotes" on Pinterest. See more ideas about quotes, funny quotes, smartass quotes.

10. "Me thinking about my life." 11. "When you're an adult but you feel like a kid faking their way through life." 12. "When everything is going wrong in your life but you're used to it." 13. "Me ...Smartass When Biden stopped off at a frozen custard shop in Milwaukee back in 2010, the manager offered him a dessert for free if the veep cut taxes, Fox News reported.Funny Clever Jokes That Make You Sound Smart. There are a lot of ways to make people laugh through a handful of words. But when it comes to a sophisticated audience, an average «pop» joke is not enough. To sound smart and witty, get inspired with these funny clever jokes: Why was 500AD to 900AD known as the Dark Ages?Jun 26, 2023 · 28. “The easiest way to organize your stuff is to get rid of most of it.”. 29. “When science finally locates the center of the universe, some people will be surprised to learn they’re not it.” —Bernard Bailey. 30. “Life is like an onion; you peel off one layer at a time and sometimes you weep.” —Carl Sandburg. 31. Apr 19, 2022 · 7. "I tried to be normal once. Worst two minutes of my life." 8. "Life is like looking for your phone, most of the time it's in your hand." 9. "To be old and wise you must first be young and ... Whatever your goal, you can get there if you’re willing to work.” —Oprah. “Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one’s definition of your life; define yourself.” —Harvey Fierstein. “Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance, you must keep moving.” —Albert Einstein. his wife is beautiful and his children smart. - H. L. Mencken. Work as smart as you are able. - Mary Anne Radmacher. At the beginning of a relationship we are attracted to the other person because we think they are sexy, smart, funny - whatever it is that we find appealing. But very quickly, the focus of the relationship turns to whether we ...

Often the best clever quotes are actually making fun of the person saying them, which shows that some very clever people enjoy making fun of themselves, instead of others. Humor is a great way to soften the blow of …4. “Even if you are on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.” —Will Rogers. 5. “If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito.” —Dalai Lama. 2. Funny Quotes About Life. Life throws a lot at you.33. “Have some fun with your life. Call in sick to places you don’t even work at.” – Anonymous. 34. “Life is hard. After all, it kills you.” – Katharine Hepburn. Sarcastic Quotes on People and Their Characteristics. 35. “Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until they speak.” – Steven Wright And the world's biggest smartass award goes to... Related comedy Funny Pictures. Go To Homepage. Before You Go. You're Not Helping ... 22 Of The Funniest Tweets About Cats And Dogs This Week (Feb. 18-24) ... NEWS POLITICS ENTERTAINMENT LIFE VOICES HUFFPOST PERSONAL SHOPPING NEWSLETTERS.Work Smart Quotes. “Stars do not pull each other down to be more visible; they shine brighter.”. “You don't need to work hard to earn an empire; there is an army of slaves to do it for you.”. “They aren't roadblocks. They're signposts.”. and you will earn good rewards.This collection of fun and funny quotes will hopefully bring a smile to your face, and can be used for a variety of crafts, like cards, posters, and signs, or for social media captions and graphics. Sit back, relax, and bring a bit of comedy into your life with these 111 lines of reflection, humor, and lived experience. 19 Funny quotes about life

Sep 19, 2023 - These sassy sarcastic quotes fuel our day, every day. It's like the vision board that personifies us. We're sassy, sarcastic, quirky, snarky, and smartass-y!The price for a life insurance policy can vary dramatically, often running from $132 to $9,696 per year. There are many reasons for those price differences, as a lot of factors affect life insurance quotes.denialism quotes “My brain is 90% sarcasm and 10% intelligence, and it works like a charm.” “If being a smartass was a profession, I’d be a millionaire.”2 inches but really thick Classic T-Shirt. By The-Directory. From $19.84. Funny Sarcastic Sayings Smart Ass Donkey Sarcasm Classic T-Shirt. By sunnym79. From $19.84. Dilly Dallying Essential T-Shirt. By kjanedesigns. From $19.84.Funny Quotes About Life Woman's Day/Getty Images 1. "There is no sunrise so beautiful that it is worth waking me up to see it." ―Mindy Kaling 2. "Life is short. Drive fast and leave a sexy...

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"I've got all the money I'll ever need, if I die by four o'clock." -Henry Youngman "By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be a boss and work twelve hours a day." -Robert Frost More Quotes Quotes About Surrounding Yourself with Happiness | Surrounding yourself with happiness at work may not be easy, but it's worth a shot.Breakup Quotes. Quotes tagged as "breakup" Showing 1-30 of 1,045. “I think you still love me, but we can’t escape the fact that I’m not enough for you. I knew this was going to happen. So I’m not blaming you for falling in love with another woman. I’m not angry, either. I should be, but I’m not. I just feel pain. A lot of pain."I've got all the money I'll ever need, if I die by four o'clock." -Henry Youngman "By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be a boss and work twelve hours a day." -Robert Frost More Quotes Quotes About Surrounding Yourself with Happiness | Surrounding yourself with happiness at work may not be easy, but it's worth a shot.Funny Smart Quotes Funny Quotes about Smart. Let these funny Smart Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day. A person is smart. People are dumb, panicky dangerous animals and you know it. Fifteen hundred years ago everybody knew the Earth was the center of the universe. Five hundred years ago,01 “I bet it took you a whole year to come up with that one.”. This is something you can use when the smartass says something really funny. It says that you know he/she isn’t good at this, so it must’ve taken some time to come up with the line. 02 “The last time I saw something like you, I flushed it.”.

Check out 300 funny quotes to make you laugh out loud and improve your day with a few chuckles along the way. Skip to content. Menu. Quotes. Famous Quotes; ... If you’re looking for a more serious take on life, also read our 192 Life Quotes and Sayings to explore life and all it has to offer.Funny Quotes About Life Woman's Day/Getty Images 1. "There is no sunrise so beautiful that it is worth waking me up to see it." ―Mindy Kaling 2. "Life is short. Drive fast and leave a sexy...If there's one word I struggle with the most, it's "balance." I have come to the conclusion, after years of searching through sweaty palms and skyrocketing pulse rates, that there is absolutely, undeniably, no su...Sep 1, 2023 - Explore Lourdes's board "Smart Ass Humor" on Pinterest. See more ideas about humor, bones funny, funny quotes.Laughs, Serious Quotes, Jokes. 249,268 likes · 158,588 talking about this. JOKES LAUGHS AND QUOTES....KEEP SMILING... PLEASE SHARE WITH YOUR FRIENDS AND...Work Smart Quotes. “Stars do not pull each other down to be more visible; they shine brighter.”. “You don't need to work hard to earn an empire; there is an army of slaves to do it for you.”. “They aren't roadblocks. They're signposts.”. and you will earn good rewards.Jan 16, 2019 - Explore Jody Hardesty's board "Funny smartass", followed by 160 people on Pinterest. See more ideas about funny, funny quotes, sarcastic quotes.1. “The past is a stepping stone, not a millstone.”. 2. “The past has no power over the present moment.”. 3. “When we are tired, we are attacked by ideas we conquered long ago.”. 4. “Change is the law of life. And those who look only to the past or present are certain to miss the future.”.Inspiring Short Quotes. “Impossible is for the unwilling.” ~ John Keats. “No pressure, no diamonds.” ~ Thomas Carlyle. “Dream big and dare to fail.” ~ Norman Vaughan. “Excuses are the nails used to build a house of failure.” ~ Jim Rohn. “We can’t help everyone, but everyone can help someone.” ~ Ronald Reagan.Jan 30, 2023 · The meaning of life is to give life meaning. – Ken Hudgins; The true meaning of life is to plant trees, under whose shade you do not expect to sit. – Nelson Henderson; When words fail, music speaks. – Shakespeare ; Embrace the glorious mess that you are. – Elizabeth Gilbert; Normality is a paved road: it’s comfortable to walk but no ...

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Sep 20, 2021 · “Everything in life has the potential to be funny. Stop hating on smartasses. Smartasses seize the moment while you are too busy over there being uptight. Born with a smirk, smartass for life.” “If you are going to be a smart ass, you at least have to be smart first. Otherwise you are simply just an ass.” his wife is beautiful and his children smart. - H. L. Mencken. Work as smart as you are able. - Mary Anne Radmacher. At the beginning of a relationship we are attracted to the other person because we think they are sexy, smart, funny - whatever it is that we find appealing. But very quickly, the focus of the relationship turns to whether we ... Mar 20, 2023 - Explore marie vandiver's board "smartass quotes" on Pinterest. See more ideas about quotes, funny quotes, smartass quotes.Check out 300 funny quotes to make you laugh out loud and improve your day with a few chuckles along the way. Skip to content. Menu. Quotes. Famous Quotes; ... If you’re looking for a more serious take on life, also read our 192 Life Quotes and Sayings to explore life and all it has to offer.Quotes tagged as "funny" Showing 1-30 of 9,860. “You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America ...16. Being smart is always reading other people. “One of the smartest things you can do as a manager is to hire the right person and then keep them happy. Happy workers tend to take less time off ...These 101 funny quotes from comedians, movies, authors, and TV look at the hilarious side of life. Enjoy these funny quotes, a laugh and share with a friend.Here are the top 25 funny smartass quotes about life that are sure to bring a smile to your face. 1. "Life is short, smile while you still have teeth." 2. "I may be a smartass, but I'm a damn good one." 3. "Life is like a roller coaster - full of ups, downs, and a lot of screaming." 4. "I'm not lazy, I'm just on energy ...Sep 25, 2023 · 7. The kind of life motivation I need. “Life will be boring AF if you never mess up.”. 8. Sometimes you need to indulge the sense of humor of *LIFE*. “When something goes wrong in your life, just say ‘PLOT TWIST’ and move on.”. 9. But I want the ones with truffle and peanut butter. “Life is like a box of chocolates. Check out our smartass quotes selection for the very best in unique or custom, handmade pieces from our digital prints shops. ... Don't be a smartass that job is taken svg shirt design for the smartass in your life. (1.3k) $ 2.99. Add to Favorites ... Smart Ass Shirt, Funny Donkey Shirt, Smartass Tshirt (118) $ 20.00 ...

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Like. "A stupid person can make only certain, limited types of errors; the mistakes open to a clever fellow are far broader. But to the one who knows how smart he is compared to everyone else, the possibilities for true idiocy are boundless.". ― Steven Brust, Iorich. tags: humor , smartass , smartness , stupid. 53 likes.Top 80 sarcastic quotes 1. Sarcasm is the brain defence mechanism against stupid people. See more ideas about quotes funny quotes smartass quotes. The lowest of the low. …Enjoy reading and share 100 famous quotes about Smartass with everyone ... Master of Stupidity: If I tell you, there is nobody left to be made fun of. — Toba Beta. Smartass Disciple: Master, that guy's teaching is somehow ... Well, I forget. Shit happened, life goes on. — Toba Beta. Smartass Disciple: Master, can you trust this bank to keep ...“I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade… And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party. “ – Ron White. 2. Sometimes having fun is part of life “To …Funny how to diet quote. 21. If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee. - Abraham Lincoln. 22. Food is a lot of people's thereapy - When we say comfort food, we really mean that. It's releasing dopamine and serotonin in your brian that makes you feel good. - Brett Hoebel.Funny how to diet quote. 21. If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee. - Abraham Lincoln. 22. Food is a lot of people's thereapy - When we say comfort food, we really mean that. It's releasing dopamine and serotonin in your brian that makes you feel good. - Brett Hoebel.Stop procrastinating because who knows what tomorrow brings. “Seize the moment. Remember all those women on the ‘Titanic’ who waved off the dessert cart.” —Erma Bombeck. Procrastination can be bad for your health—and that includes your mental health. Humorist Erma Bombeck understood that well.Lawrence Welk. Good Day, Bad Day, Parental. 20 Copy quote. Show source. Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.14-jan-2023 - Bekijk het bord "Bullet quotes" van Nele Claes op Pinterest. Bekijk meer ideeën over citaten, teksten, inspirerende citaten.These bright pupils came up with the funniest test answers harnessing the powers of puns and their creativity. Reasons for choosing to answer the questions this way are unknown, but we have a strong feeling, that the hard questions brought out some A-class smartasses out. The tricky question, though, is if a kid answers to a problem on a …I don't feel anything when I watch Shaquille O'Neal play. I don't feel anything coming off him. Dennis Rodman. I don't fit into the mold of the NBA man, and I think I've been punished financially for it. Dennis Rodman. In jail I was just like everybody else, I was sitting there praying, feeling caged. Dennis Rodman. ….

Barbra Streisand. Short Life, Life Is Too Short, Life Is Short. 29 Copy quote. The most powerful social media... it is not the internet, it is not Facebook - it is food. This connects all human beings.I don't feel anything when I watch Shaquille O'Neal play. I don't feel anything coming off him. Dennis Rodman. I don't fit into the mold of the NBA man, and I think I've been punished financially for it. Dennis Rodman. In jail I was just like everybody else, I was sitting there praying, feeling caged. Dennis Rodman.Sometimes a funny text message is more than just a funny text message. Connection is key in every relationship, but day-to-day life—from work, kids, and chores to our attachment to our phones—can make it difficult to regularly communicate a...Mar 7, 2021 · Badass Quotes for Haters. “As the shit becomes deep, I smile and buy higher heels.”— unknown. “Remember no one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”. —Eleanor Roosevelt. “Excellence is the best deterrent to racism or sexism.”. —Oprah Winfrey. “There is a special place in hell for women who do not help other women Here are the top 25 funny smartass quotes about life that are sure to bring a smile to your face. 1. “Life is short, smile while you still have teeth.” 2. “I may be a smartass, but I’m a damn good one.” 3. “Life is like a roller coaster – full of ups, downs, and a lot of screaming.” 4. “I’m not lazy, I’m just on energy ...Funny Smart Quotes Funny Quotes about Smart. Let these funny Smart Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day. A person is smart. People are dumb, panicky dangerous animals and you know it. Fifteen hundred years ago everybody knew the Earth was the center of the universe. Five hundred years ago,Everyone loves a great pun. Our collection of funny puns give everyone all the feels.Funny Witty Quotes. “Do your own thinking independently. Be the chess player, not the chess piece.” ~ Ralph Charell. “If you are not yelling at your kids, you are not spending enough time with them.” ~ Reese Witherspoon. “A person is wise if he listens to millions of advice and doesn’t implement any of it.” ~ Michael Bassey Johnson.May 17, 2023 · Witty Quotes to Sharpen Your Cleverness. “When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye!!!!!”. “Arguing with a fool proves there are two.”. – Doris M. Smith. “Better a witty fool than a foolish wit.”. – William Shakespeare. catchy clever quotes. “If we cannot be clever, we can always be kind.”. – Alfred Fripp. Funny smartass quotes about life, [text-1-1], [text-1-1], [text-1-1], [text-1-1], [text-1-1], [text-1-1], [text-1-1], [text-1-1], [text-1-1], [text-1-1], [text-1-1], [text-1-1], [text-1-1], [text-1-1], [text-1-1], [text-1-1], [text-1-1], [text-1-1], [text-1-1], [text-1-1], [text-1-1], [text-1-1], [text-1-1], [text-1-1], [text-1-1], [text-1-1], [text-1-1], [text-1-1], [text-1-1], [text-1-1], [text-1-1], [text-1-1], [text-1-1]